Tears Shed In Remembrance Of Old Ref

By Sean Ayres

Third year law student John Smith shed a quiet tear yesterday as he walked past the new Student Centre on his usual pilgrimage back and forth between the Tav and law cafe.

John’s heart aches thinking of the loss of the Old Ref. It was a golden age of Murdoch University when the dingy and dirty, yet lovable and homely establishment welcomed students.

In his interview with METIOR, Smith stated he is plagued with memories of first year, where he would sit on the bean bags with his girlfriend, eating Short Order chips with that Sriracha mayo sauce. His frustration grows with each passing year as less and less students have any idea what he’s talking about.

“It’s really sad you know, because these kids will never know that sweet taste of Sriracha mayo or the ability to buy a mediocre meal for $5 on campus”

The new student centre’s restaurants have not yet been installed, with speculation around the University being that completion is at least 3 years away, as every construction company in Perth has become insolvent.

At least vet students will still be at university to experience it.

The massive TV in the student centre has also reportedly given several first years third degree burns from its radiant heat.

The university claims that the Student Centre is coming along nicely and looks snazzy in photos.